Accept change…whatever it looks like…and embrace it.
Type a sentence. Delete the sentence. Type several paragraphs. Erase several paragraphs. My brain wanders in circles as I try to write this post about change. Not physical change like I talked about in my last post but circumstantial changes. Life changes. Leave what’s comfortable and risk time, energy and money kind of changes. It’s not like it’s the first time I’ve faced change. Marriage. Kids. Moves. Jobs. Loss of family members. Loss of friends. Throughout my 45 years of life, I’ve accepted and embraced changes. Sometimes the transitions proved easy, other times not so much. This latest challenge and change I face excites and scares me so much that it’s hard to write about.
After 13 years of baking and decorating cakes, I’m hanging up my apron. March 29, 2012 will be the last day of Pattycakes. I’ll miss it. I’ll miss my customers. I’m sure in time I’ll miss the smell of powdered sugar in my hair. But Brad and I are confident that it’s time to say goodbye to this season and, in a way, go back in time to a long-forgotten (or at least shelved) dream of 20-year-old me.
You see, I didn’t always want to be a baker and business owner. In fact, I never dreamed of it. My dream, as a young woman, was to help people be whole and healthy by counseling others in a professional setting. In 1986 I changed my major from Secondary Ed/English to Psychology and spent the next few years preparing for a future of counseling. Well, marriage to an amazing man and the strong desire for children that shortly followed outweighed any pull to go back to school.
But now? Now’s the time.
The path ahead seems clear (MA in Counseling) but not without challenges. Challenges like…umm…oh, I don’t know…getting into a program….and taking the GRE and/or MAT after 23 years…and juggling family and school work and probably a part-time job…oh, and paying for it. I know God has used the last 20 plus years preparing me, shaping me and molding me for this task. But to say it out loud, to tell all of you that I’ll hopefully be among the throng of eager students in the fall, seems surreal and I can’t think ahead too much or my fear grips me and my heart rate surges.
Change. Accept. Embrace. Trust.
This is what the LORD says: “Stand at the crossroads and look; ask for the ancient paths, ask where the good way is, and walk in it, and you will find rest for your souls…” ~Jeremiah 6:16