The older I get, (and as we approach the 1 year anniversary of my dad’s death) the more I see how imperative it is to walk through grief and pain with others. Grief is intensely personal and yet needs to be communal. I mean, it’s personal–my grief isn’t the same as my sister’s or mom’s or my kid’s grief– but it can’t be private. If we keep our grief private, we suffer. In the midst of our personal pain, we need community. We need others around us to remind us that life and death are shared experiences and we’re not alone.
I am not alone.
You, dear reader, in whatever pain you face today, are not alone.
Sharing life and death and hurts with others is hard isn’t it? It’s hard as the grief-stricken and hurting to share something so personal. And as the comforter, it can be inconvenient and uncomfortable to reach out to those in pain. It may mean rearranging our schedule or spending money to travel or stepping out of our comfort zone to bring comfort. Yet, we need to do it. I mean, we’ve all experienced hurts right? We can all relate on some level to feelings of loss and loneliness and pain, right? When we remember our own times of trouble, we can empathize and be present for someone else in their hurts–so they know they are not alone. But that’s where some of us get hung up. We don’t always want to revisit our own painful times, especially if the wounds are fresh or haven’t healed. I believe, though, as we live in honest community sharing one another’s sorrows, we can continue to find peace and healing in our own hearts.
I wish I could say more, write more, and expand more, but I think I’d only be doing it as a purge for myself, and that’s not the point to this blog. So, what is the point of this post? I guess it’s a reminder and hopefully a prompt that if someone in your life is hurting and specifically grieving, just simply let them know they’re not alone. You don’t have to fix them or take away their hurt, just be present in their lives.
Always speak blessings, not curses.
If some have cause to celebrate, join in the celebration.
And if others are weeping, join in that as well.
~ Paul to the Romans
Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ,
the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort,
who comforts us in all our troubles,
so that we can comfort those in any trouble
with the comfort we ourselves receive from God.
~ Paul to the Corinthians